32 - Guests and Spending

Abu Usayd as-Sa'idi invited the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, to his wedding. His wife, who was the bride, served them that day. She said, "Do you know what I served the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace? I served him some dates which had been infused in a pot overnight."

Nu'aym ibn Qa'nab said, "I went to Abu Dharr and did not find him at home. I asked his wife, 'Where is Abu Dharr?' 'Fetching some things for the house. He will be back presently.' I sat down to wait for him and he came with two camels. One of them was lined up behind the other and each of the camels had a waterskin on its neck. Abu Dharr took them off. Then he came and I said, 'Abu Dharr! There was no man who I desired to meet more than you and there was none that I hated to meet more than you!' He said, 'Your father is for Allah! How can these two be joined together?' I replied, 'In the Jahiliyya, a buried a daughter alive and I feared that I would meet you and you would say, "There is no way for you to repent. There is no way out." On the other hand, I used to hope that you would say, "There is a way for you to repent. There is a way out."' He asked," Did you do that in the Jahiliyah?" And Nuaym said "Yes.". Abu Dharr (ra) said," Allah has forgiven the sins committed earlier (before the Islamic times)".

He then said to his wife," Bring us the meal." But she refused to do so. He then commanded her but she again refused to bring it and their voices were soon raised. Abu Dharr (ra) said," You will not go beyond what the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) has said".

Nuaym asked," What has the Messenger of Allah said about them?" Abu Dharr (ra) said," The Messenger of Allah has said that a woman is created from a crooked rib and if you attempt to straighten it you will break it but if you leave her alone you will enjoy her while the crookedness remains in her".

His wife then turned her back to them and went away and brought thareed as though she matched the bird Qatah (in swiftness). He then said," you go ahead, eat the food. And do not worry (about eating alone). For I am fasting," he stood up to offer prayers and hurried to the bowing posture. After he had finished his prayer, he began to eat. Nuaym exclaimed, "We belong to Allah! I had given no thought to it that you would lie to me. You said just now that you were fasting and you have come to eat".

He said,"Your father is for Allah! Ever since I have met you, I have not spoken a lie." Nuaym said, "Did you not tell me that you were fasting?" He said,"Yes. I have kept three fasts in this month so that the reward for it is written down for me while it is lawful for me to eat too.

Thawban reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "The best dinar a man spends is the dinar which he spends on his family, the dinar which he spends on his companions in the Way of Allah, and the dinar which he spends on his riding animal in the Way of Allah."

Abu Mas'ud al-Badri reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "When someone spends something on his family and reckons its reward to be with Allah, then it is sadaqa for him."

Jabir said, "A man said, 'Messenger of Allah, I have a dinar.' He said, 'Spend it on yourself.' The man said, 'I have another.' He said, 'Spend it on your servant (or he said, 'on your child').' The man said, 'I have another.' He said, 'Use it in the Way of Allah, but that is the least form of sadaqa.'"

Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "There are four dinars:

a dinar which you give to a poor person, a dinar you give to free a slave, a dinar you spend in the Way of Allah, and a dinar which you spend on your family. The best of them is the dinar which you spend on your family."

Sa'd ibn Abi Waqqas transmitted that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said to him, "You do not spend anything by which you desire the face of Allah Almighty but that you art rewarded for it, even what you place in your wife's mouth."

Abu Hurayra reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "Our Lord, the Blessed and Exalted, descends to the lowest heaven every night when a third of the night remains. He says, 'Who is calling on Me so that I can answer him? Who is asking Me for something so that I can give to him? "Who is asking Me for forgiveness so that I can forgive him?'"